Asking the families of maimed and dead might not be the most objective way of dealing with this subject - they may be out for revenge, not justice. That's why there's a system of law with judges and juries in most countries, not a ballot of parents of 'tender innocent flesh' (might be true but it's deliberately emotive language).
And no, I don't really know if there's an afterlife, but just because billions believe in one doesn't make it any more likely or unlikely I'm afraid. If you say 'a martyr deserves what he gets' - well I'm no expert on Islam but I think you get quite a good deal (it might not apply in his case, I don't know the religious ins and outs). So you're happy to kill him so he gets his comfy cloud + virgins and nice food much faster? Wouldn't you like to see him rot for a few decades in an earthly prison first?
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