Tuesday, May 01, 2007
A moment for quiet reflection
Normal blogging takes a break today, as we concentrate on the joyful business of celebrating Tony's ten years in power. (See the previous post, too.)
Look around you; look at the clean, shiny streets, the smartly-dressed and respectful adolescents, the happy and well-fed elderly. Consider how, in just ten years, crime has been slashed, NHS bureaucracy swept away, and child poverty rendered but a distant memory. Britain leads in Europe, and stands tall in the world once again. A network of talking CCTV cameras keeps us safe from muggers; our car journeys are tracked and logged onto a massive database, and ID cards will protect us from identity theft.
Since 1997, life expectancy has increased by more than 1.1 years, average waistlines by nearly an inch, and the girth of the average Briton's cock by a similar amount. Exam passes continue their giddy rise year on year, and there will for the first time be an all-English Champions League final. (Thank the EU for that; without free movement of people, how else could Argentina's Gabriel Heinze and the Ivory Coast's Didier Drogba ply their trade in our leagues?) Your whites wash whiter, your beer is foamier, and I can't be the only one, surely, who's noticed that the quality and duration of our orgasms is at an all-time high. [Though in my case, still self-administered. Some things haven't changed]
It's hard to imagine now, but just ten years ago this land lived under the dark fist of Majorism; the Tories' 22 tax rises of 1992-97 hit ordinary hardworking families disproportionately hard, and constant internecine warfare inside the government had left the country rudderless and drifting.
Contrast the bitterness and division of those benighted days with the broad, sunlit uplands in which we gambol today, and give quiet thanks for the whirlwind of activity that has transformed Britain into a land fit for heroes. And weep, too; weep for those who did not live to see the new world that Tony has fashioned.
But be not complacent. As Polly
reminds us today, there are elections coming up on Thursday; and apparently some poor, misguided souls are planning to vote for change. Why, in God's name? As she [rightly] says:
Those who wanted more social justice, better public services, childcare, nurseries, maternity leave, a minimum wage, big increases in children's benefits, new schools, clinics, and hospitals, got more than was ever promised back then.
That's goddamned right. Much has been achieved, as Ms Toynbee notes; but there is still much left to do. That gushing tap of public spending could be reduced to a mere trickle at any time. Don't let the Tories ruin everything.
And now, if you'll pardon me, I must go; today
also marks the 300th anniversary of the Union between Scotland and England, and I presume that there will be a parade of some sort; perhaps a giant street party on Princes Street, and fireworks ringing out from the castle as night falls. We'll dance and drink, raise a glass to three hundred years of partnership and prosperity, and put aside all our troubles, for a few hours at least. After all, what kind of ill-at-ease, divided country wouldn't want to celebrate its tercentenary in style?
