Hey, Goffik, we'll only make you carry it on your back as a last resort, but if you're the fat bastard that you claim to be, then you ought to be just what we need on the end of a lever. Or maybe we can use you instead of a lintel to anchor the rope. ;^)
I liked your ":oP" smiley. I haven't seen that one before. Would you call it a "raspberry smiley"? You can do it to the left or the right with P or b; cool.