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Jesus I despise Brexit.
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giNgko_C
giNgko_C
1618 posts

Edited Aug 15, 2019, 14:35
Policy #2: Taxation and Wages
Aug 15, 2019, 14:27
13% tax on everything, with a £14 minimum wage, earnings threshold set to £15,000 - I haven't done the math but it references Pythagarous so it works, probably 41% on earnings over £51,000, 61% over $210,000 or some reverse Fibonacci series
giNgko_C
giNgko_C
1618 posts

Policy #3: Drugs, Alcohol and Firearms
Aug 15, 2019, 14:32
To be regulated in order to invent policies 4 through 12 coherently.

Cx
giNgko_C
giNgko_C
1618 posts

Edited Aug 15, 2019, 15:13
Policy #4: Law and Order
Aug 15, 2019, 15:10
Only people named Lauren will be in charge of sentencing policy, the judiciary in higher criminal cases will have to consult with a randomly selected room full of Laurens in order to pass sentence.

Anybody named "Dawder" will have their brain harvested for neraul interface research.

That should buy us some time.
giNgko_C
giNgko_C
1618 posts

Edited Aug 15, 2019, 15:26
Policy #5: Information and the disemination of
Aug 15, 2019, 15:21
Edward Snowdon to be appointed Information Comissioner, and all internet data to be passed through servers maintained by the Lutheran Church.

8chan or variants of to be replaced with a consolidation of guitar tab resources. Any hate speech to be converted into easily pickupable mandolin pieces even your four year old can play.
giNgko_C
giNgko_C
1618 posts

Policy #6: Death and Deafness
Aug 15, 2019, 15:34
Death to be outlawed by shouting very loudly into everybody's ears. Eventually we will be born without ears, and therefore not die.
giNgko_C
giNgko_C
1618 posts

Edited Aug 15, 2019, 15:47
Policy #7: Environment and resource management
Aug 15, 2019, 15:41
Phwoarrr, who dropped one?

who dropped one?

WHO DROPPED ONE!?

WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE WHO DROPPED ONE.

Edward Snowdon to set up Twitter account for homemade solar powered atmospheric humidity condenser in the Sahara, which he has set up personally and comes back with a sun tan. Otherwise it's nuclear all the way baby! All the way to San Jose, Iosser! If he gets it past the NIMBYS and the Tuaregs of course. Fuck, anybody want an authentic gollywog doll on eBay for a tenner?
giNgko_C
giNgko_C
1618 posts

Edited Aug 15, 2019, 16:48
Policy #8: Food and Agriculture
Aug 15, 2019, 15:56
Well, crumbs are better than no bread at all, I'd imagine Edward Snowden would have perished shortly out of Sinea.

What if, right, Brexit is like a giant scab of your own face and when you look in the mirror your nose isn't there anymore?

"Ooooh, I've got noone to sell my sheep to now."

Bollocks I say - let these sheep become the seven lambs of Revelation and I'll eat them all until I explode and turn into a giant Japanese Manga sheep and start grazing on bloody Bolsonaro's fake Jesus face.

"NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM"

what was that Boris?

"Oh, it's just that tiny sculpture of Jesus they had in Brazil "NOM NOM NOM", hang on i'm about to shit mushrooms"

((hullo, Jesus here again, did you just eat me?))

Yes, "NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM"

((oh, so I suppose when I've been shat out whole there'll be a NOM'N clatter?))

Yes, "NOM NOM NOM", I'm shitting rainbows too, it's why you're all skittle shaped.
giNgko_C
giNgko_C
1618 posts

Edited Aug 19, 2019, 16:19
Re: Jesus I despise Brexit.
Aug 19, 2019, 16:05
AHA! I think I have cracked the Green Party's special political code:

Kent is mostly made of chalk and a bus sank in Norwich after 10 years of a Tory administration, so when a bus driver walks out of his job because all his mates and all the young people of Norwich who like to stab alcoholics on Prince Street will continue taking the piss out of him for having a few colours on his number, half of Kent will eventually sink into the sea.

Then there will be no Deal. Norwich will remain.

But you'll have to swim for it, like it were worth the effort.

Cx

Oh, the Monster Raving Loony Party suggestions only numbered 8 because you can get an even tempered solfageo out of it, but also gave up at 12 because in summoning the Blitz Spirit 2/3 ain't bad.
nigelswift
8065 posts

Edited Aug 22, 2019, 10:58
Prescriptions
Aug 22, 2019, 10:49
My (entirely essential) prescriptions are "delayed" (not known for how long).
I wonder if that's due to the thick shits who voted Brexit?

https://www.gponline.com/medicine-shortages-set-continue-despite-brexit-delay/article/1582413
PMM
PMM
3155 posts

Edited Aug 25, 2019, 04:15
Re: Prescriptions
Aug 24, 2019, 22:47
It's an interesting tactic. Calling people that you disagree with bad things.

Not sure how effective it is as a means of actually helping people to change their position though. Isn't that what you want to happen?

Seriously though, I see this everywhere, and I'm as guily of it as anyone. Never really thought of this before but I've really limited and drawn back the scope of what I do on the internet, and that's maybe caused a sense of someone looking in.

I see it outside of the internet too. Perhaps 90% of my work is addressing the emotions of my clients, from extreme nervousness to supreme overconfidence, to get them to fit in with a community of people who themselves range through the whole gamut of human emotions. There are rules of engagement, which are taught extensively, and it ends up with most people following most of the rules most of the time.

An analogy might be that I'm driving in the outside lane of a road. In lane one there is a broken down car, and before that is someone who has dealt with the situation poorly, and now needs to change lanes. That driver that put themseles in that position might have done so because they weren't sure, and braked when that was not the best thing to do, or they might have just flown down my inside and are now signalling and positioning urgently and assertively. Or because they just didn't read the warning signs, or those signs were partially obscured by fog. I'm not in anyway responsible for their actions but I can choose what to do about it.

Some of the time I will be the guy in lane one that got it wrong. I fear and dislike the people that decide to make a point of how shit my driving is rather than creating a space for me to move into.
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